Never walk away..

After Danny walked away from me yesterday and said he would come pick up his things when I asked where he wanted them, I thought we were done. That we had given up on each other.

I called him before leaving for work to tell him that he wouldn't be able to get his things since I would be gone. He stated he wanted to meet up after work. I told him that I would appreciate it and wanted to talk about things. He told me he would call me when I got done.

To be completely honest, I didn't think he would. I figured he'd either be drinking, smoking or sleeping. I figured he didn't want to see me. However, he called me at 10:30 p.m. on the dot. He of course wasn't in town; he was an hour away helping his friend Tony take care of something. And told me he'd see me in an hour if I still wanted to meet up with him.

Three hours later, he finally makes it back to Wall. He starts off my apologizing.. repeatedly.

I told him that it hurt that he didn't even want to talk about things. That he just walked away from me. I told him that scared me. I also told him what I need from him if he wants to make this relationship work. He needs to spend more time with me than his friends. He needs to help out around the house more, physically and financially. Of course he replied that he would work on everything, but I wondered if he was just saying that to make me happy, knowing that was what I wanted to hear. However, today after he finished work, he called me and asked if I wanted to hang out with him before I had to go to work. So he is putting in the effort to make time for me, and I love that, and I hope that never ends!

Last night he also asked me if I will ever be able to trust him. I replied by shaking my head and later saying, "I don't know." And I really don't. All I know: I definitely won't be able to anytime soon. The fact that he's willing to put up with a girlfriend that doesn't trust him and gives him a hard time because of it, blows my mind. But I'm glad he realizes that by being in a relationship, he needs to compromise some of his freedom.

I leave for California soon. Danny won't be staying at our house while we're gone. And although I'm worried to be away from him for a whole week, I think the space will do us good. I think it will bring us closer together. We will see when I get back.

For the time being, I'm glad that Danny is still in my life. I'm glad that we talked through another issue. Although Danny has frustrated me several times since we reunited, he has also surprised me again and again with his persistence to communicate and work through our differences. I hope he continues to surprise me. I hope he never gives up. I hope we can prove everyone wrong.

After our heart-to-heart, I told him, "Never walk away from me every again."

~Erin Lester