Love doesn't cost a thing, but life does..

We've all heard the expression, "Money can't buy happiness." Part of me believes this. At the same time, bills don't buy happiness either. Or debt. Or bad credit.

It seems that money is a big problem in most relationships. In fact, it rates as the number one problem in relationships and about 80 percent of all divorces are the result of money issues. Yes, you guessed it. It is a problem in my relationship. I have a good amount of savings, but I also have thousands of dollars of student loans to pay off as well, on top of the other monthly bills.

The bigger problem is my boyfriend. He has a great job, a career actually, but he has a hard time saving money. In his defense, he does take care of his 76-year-old alcoholic Alzheimer's father, support his two-year-old daughter and cover for his trouble-making older brother. This in turn leaves him no money to take care of himself so he borrows from his friends which only continues the viscous cycle.

This fact scares me. It makes me worry about our future, if we have one. He tells me he wants to marry me and have kids with me and support me. In fact, he wants to have a child right now. Well, news flash: it costs a lot of money taking care of a child which he should know since he's paying child support.

I believe that he wants to do all these things. However, I don't know the line between reality and ideal in this situation. Sure, he says he wants to take care of me. But is that the future that he wants? Or does he just dream of having that future? In my mind, if he really wants to support me, he'd be working a hell of a lot harder saving money.

I've made a decision, and I hope I stick with it. He gets paid again Friday. If I don't see a penny, he's going to have to find somewhere else to stay until he can help out around the house. He claims he doesn't owe anyone in town money, and when I told him that this month he would have to pay for his father and daughter, he replied he doesn't have to do that until his next paycheck. Well, I hope so. I can't keep taking care of him forever. And if we do have a child in the future, I can't take care of the three of us. I barely have enough money to secure my future.

He needs to learn, and if that is the only way, so be it. I understand the wedding vows say for richer or for poorer. Well, there's only so much I can handle. I can only provide for him for so long before I require something in return.

I need more than an, "I want to help you." I need to see him try. And eventually, I need to see him do.

~Erin Lester
Facts: Marriage Success Secrets